"Dashing Through The Snow" Coming to Kirtland Community College

Day 22

Coming to Kirtland Center for the Performing Arts "Dashing Through the Snow" performed live December 11 at 8 pm, December 12 at 7 pm and December 13 at 2 pm. For more info click here.  Then scroll down.

Kirtland Center for the Performing Arts will be doing a LIVE radio broadcast of "A Christmas Carol" on December 19th at 5 pm. Broadcast on 100.3 FM. Seating is limited and no one will be admitted after 4:55 pm. For more info click here.

Until tomorrow,

Ken

Here's a Shot of Wild Turkey

Day 17

It's the day before Thanksgiving and the day started in the usual way which I won't elaborate on here. I dragged my feet into the kitchen to find the coffee wasn't made. Probably because I hadn't made it. While the coffee maker was spitting out the dark, bitter brew that makes my mornings bearable, a thought occurred to me that I should wash the dinner dishes from the night before. This is called multi-tasking.

I began filling the sink and glanced out of the window to see how much snow was left on the ground (the previous day had been warm). When what to my bloodshot eyes should appear? The two legged delight from many a Thanksgiving dinner. There must have been thirty of them or more, both young and old. I've noticed some very late hatchlings this past summer. It must have something to do with the very cold and harsh winters we've had recently. I watched them as they slowly turkey trot past my window. The tom turkey coming up the rear gave me the stink eye with his beard bristling.

I grabbed my new cell phone with the built in camera and tried to take a shot of wild turkey, but the window was too dirty for a clear picture. The front of the procession had gone around the end of my house so I went to the front doorwall. As soon as I slid it open my old tom cat leapt inside and turned to see if he had been followed. My cat is a bad ass when their sparrows, but not so tough with wild turkeys as large as a medium size dog.

I soon realized the phone wouldn't do. So I grabbed my 35mm Nikon. After my first attempt to get the shot, the turkeys had turned around and headed for the back of my neighbors house. Quickly I followed them trying to a picture but I didn't have the 200mm zoom lens on the camera and I couldn't get close enough.

I returned with the stronger lens in a jiffy but the birds had already flown the coup. It's all good though, tomorrows turkey won't be going anywhere but my belly.

Until then,

Ken

Star Wars The Force Awakens: Where No Movie has Gone Before

Day 16

Let me clear this up first. I know “To boldly go where no man has gone before” is the opening for Star Trek not Star Wars.

.

Now to the point, which is $50 million in pre-release tickets being sold for the next installment of the Star Wars franchise now produced by Disney. Already $50 million and still 3 weeks before the opening. Thus far only Daniel Fleetwood, the fan who had terminal cancer, has seen it. Disney granted his request for a private showing because doctors told him he wouldn't live until the December opening. Disney agreed, quite graciously, and allowed Mr. Fleetwood to see the unfinished product. He passed away not long after. May the force be with him.

Back in 1977 when the first installment came out I refused to see it. I thought, seriously, who wants to see a movie with a name like Star Wars. It's right up there with Plan 9 from Outer Space (an Ed Wood piece of B trash). When the movie had been selling out for six months at the largest indoor screen in the Detroit area, the Americana theater, I figured it was worth a look. As I stood in line for 24 hour advance tickets, something unheard of in 1977, I was praying this was not another cult following like Rocky Horror Picture Show (Rocky Horror generally only played at midnight to hardcore fans shouting at the movie screen and occasionally dancing along with actors).

So when the lights went down and the opening story lines reverse rolled up and away from the audience, a nice effect, I thought it might not be so bad. A few minutes later came the sound of massive engines booming over the theater sound system as the most detailed spaceship I had ever seen in a movie cruised down the screen as if flying overhead. George Lucas had created a miracle of special effects. I was blown away and became an instant lifetime Star Wars fan. I have seen all of the movies numerous times and have read many of the over 100 books. A must for any Star Wars fan as the books answer many questions, such as how is a lightsaber made. Hint: very carefully.

My only regret at this time is that with the early success of the most recent addition it could be six months before it even makes it to the Pines our small town movie theater. Until it does I'll wait with anticipation of the new marvels that await.

So I learned long ago that while we should not judge a book by it's cover, it is also true we should not judge a movie by it's title. Until tomorrow.

Ken

Bad Kitty and a Kindle Fire

Day 15

If you have been reading Houghton Lake Adventures you'll probably remember that I purchased a Kindle Fire 7 a couple of weeks ago, mostly for the purpose of reading free classic books on Amazon. So far it has served that purpose admirably.

I enjoy reading in the evening when I retire to my bed. I generally lay on my stomach and prop the Kindle up on the headboard. Sometimes I lie on my back but normally I lay on my stomach.

I have two cats; one male, one female. The male is known by several names depending on his mood. Usually I call him Pretty Boy. 

Now Pretty Boy is a big orange tabby tomcat and he likes to sleep with me at night. When I go to bed he joins me. After walking back and forth between my Kindle and myself he'll sit down to the right, then scootch up as close as possible to the edge of the reader and ever so slowly lower his head toward the other side.

I move the Kindle to my left until it is perched on the very edge of the bed. Again I have a clear view of the 7” screen. The Kindle Fire 7, like other tablets has a touchscreen. When I want to turn the page I just tap or swipe the screen. I suspect Pretty Boy knows this and occasionally bats or swipes the screen with his paw. He places his paw on the screen and the page turns several times. I get angry. I shoo Pretty Boy away.

A moment later he comes back and lays down with his backside facing the Kindle. I scratch his ears. He swings his tail in a circle like a pitcher winding up for the fastball. Thump. He hits the screen. The page turns but I can't tell if it went forward or backward. I try forward. Thump goes the tail. Pretty Boy purrs. I search for the lost page, but I can't remember what I read last. Back, back, back to a page I remember reading. Going forward, rereading each page until I finally reach my previous place.

Pretty Boy looks at me. He smiles and purrs loudly and before I can chase him away...thump, thump, thump. He gets off three lightning quick shots. A real gunslinger shooting from the hip. I scream. He yawns, stretches and begins to clean his tail. Then he kneads my brand new bedspread comforter with his claws. Finished he moves away and curls up on the other side of the bed. Gotta love 'em.

Until tomorrow,

Ken

Football Saturday MSU vs Ohio State & U of M takes on Penn State

Day 13

High school football around the Houghton Lake Area has been over for a few weeks and college is coming to a close in another week.

"Coach Harbaugh said WHAT?"

Coach Harbaugh's wish does NOT come true. I can't believe ANY Michigan man would ever utter the words "Go Bucks" (Buckeyes). The loud noise coming from Ann Arbor was the sound of Michigan fans sucking in their breath.Eyes bulging in disbelief. Coach Harbaugh's justification? "I'm for anything that's good for Michigan". I have to ask, "How is Ohio State winning EVER good for Michigan" Coach Harbaugh is INSANE IN THE MEMBRANE! If you have ecer watched him on the sideline I'm sure you'll agree.

Michigan State is in the driver seat for the Big Ten East after winning 17-14 over Ohio State. GLORIOUS. Not only did they win, they won using two backup quarterbacks when starter Connor Cook (injured in last weeks game) couldn't go.  If they get a win over Penn State next week, they will face Iowa in the Big Ten Championship in Indianapolis. GO SPARTANS. I'm sure the folks in Lansing will take the high road and root for Michigan over Ohio State. Or at least be indifferent.

 Oh, and Michigan won too.

That's all for today. I have to watch the Pistons and get rested for the Lions game tomorrow. I should have plenty to say about that. Goodnight and come back soon,

Ken

Santa's Workshop is Coming to Houghton Lake Playhouse This Sunday November 22,2015

Day 11

Santa checking his list

Santa Claus IS coming to town this Sunday, November 22,2015 to the Houghton Lake Playhouse on M-55 in Houghton Lake. Santa and Mrs Claus are coming to spread some Christmas cheer at the annual Santa's Workshop sponsored by the Houghton Lake Chamber of Commerce and local businesses. The workshop is from 10 am to 3 pm. C'mon out and start the season right. Hope to see you there.  

The weather report for Saturday is 3-5 inches of snow. Coincidence? I think NOT! The big guy just wants to get us in the mood. Plus the sleigh works better on snow than asphalt. Until tomorrow thanks for stopping by.

Ken

Ultimate Holiday Fight Shopping on Pay Per View

Day 8

  

One of the worlds largest retailers announced today that they will be selling "pay-per-view" viewing of the holiday shopping frenzy that occurs during their Black Friday sales events.

In store specials will no longer be scheduled for different times during the day. All specials will begin at the same time. Executives believe this will increase the "action" between shoppers scrambling and ultimately fighting over deals located throughout the store from one end to the other. Store security cameras be used to capture the "live feed" of the spectacle.

An anonymous source disclosed that the decision came to monetize the shopping carnage after reviewing the growing popularity of cable "reality shows" and Ultimate Fighting events, the no holds barred style of fighting also popular on cable. Citing the "need to cut losses" incurred by the super low prices of items on sale.

"We needed a way to make up for the loss of profit on the items we sell much to cheaply. Our investors expect the highest possible profits, after all."

The pay-per-view idea has been in the pipeline for several years. Some personal rights groups believe the recording of people without their consent is wrong and an invasion of their privacy rights. Store attorneys have argued that by entering stores the shoppers are giving their permission to be recorded on the security cameras and that the stores retain the rights to use the recordings to make money any way they deem acceptable.

"Where's mommy?" 

(This shopping orphan was left to hold a place in line while his parents went off to other parts of the store for super sale items. The parents never returned)

When shoppers were asked if they had concerns most replied, "I'm OK with it as long as I can TiVo it to watch later. What the hell I could be on TV."

Plans are also in the works for blu ray and dvd to be released before the next holiday season.

Note: Don't believe everything you read on the internet.

Until tomorrow remember "Laughter is the best medicine."

Ken

Tales from Deer Camp Opening Day Humor

Day 7

"These stories are so funny."

When I was growing up in Royal Oak (a suburb of Detroit), for several Thanksgiving weekends, my father would pack my mother, brother and I into the car and drive north to a small town in northern Michigan called Glennie to visit my aunt, uncle and cousins. This would be the tail end of the deer hunting season and both my uncle and my father being avid deer hunters had plenty of stories to tell.

Things heard around a campfire at deer camp.

"A month before opening day I went out to my super secret hunting spot that no one else knows about and built the ultimate deer blind out of pine boughs. On opening day, just before dawn, I went back to my spot and started looking for the blind. After several hours of searching, stomping and cussing, I gave up and came back to camp. Seems I had done such a good job of building the hunting blind that I couldn't see it."

"Hey. Got anymore of those baked beans?"
"Whew! You've had too much already!"

"I had noticed a huge buck with a twelve point rack following this particular deer run a couple of times before and felt certain he would return. It wasn't long and I was rewarded with the biggest buck I had ever seen cautiously moving along the trail. Suddenly he stopped in a small clearing and I could see his ears swivel. He must have heard something. The presentation was perfect. I slowly raised my rifle and sighted in just behind the buck's shoulder. I pulled the hammer back and steadied my breathing. As I let out the last breath I squeezed the trigger. CLICK! I had forgotten to load a round into the chamber. Quickly I jacked a round into the chamber but the deer was gone."

"I had purchased a new gun. It was love at first sight when I saw that black barrel beauty. I was hesitant to buy it, opening day was the next day and I wouldn't have time to sight it in. The salesman behind the counter insured me that the sights came already set at the factory. Spot-on up to one hundred yards. I didn't expect to make a shot any farther away than that where I would be huntin'. I slapped my cash down and left with my new rifle. The next day I saw the largest buck I've ever seen. It had to have at least 14 points. I swung my new rifle up and got off a quick shot. The buck dropped into a crouch, looking for the source of the noise. I sighted in more carefully and tried again. The pine bough above and to the left of the deer broke off showering snow to the ground. The buck jumped, white tail in the air and ran off in the opposite direction. Later I went to the range and discovered the sights were NOT set at the factory."

"So I was just sittin' there when my stomach gave a rumble. I paid it no mind when suddenly I let one go that sounded like a lighthouse fog horn. Strangely enough I heard an answering call from the woods to my right. It was a buck snortin' and from the sound of it it must have been a trophy size. I couldn't quite see it so I let go another blast.This one comin' easier than the first, if you know what I mean. Sure enough the ol' fellow answered with a shrill bawl. I felt I could chance one more trumpet blast but this one I gave an extra push, seeking maximum volume. Long I waited, listening.There was no other sound. I noticed a fowl odor that did not go away even though there was a strong wind. I moved to another spot to get away from the stench. No relief. I moved again but I could not get free of the reek. It was after I returned to camp, amidst the others, mostly keeping their distance, I realized the odor was emanating from me. It seems I pushed too hard on the last one. Nothing that a shower and clean underwear couldn't fix."

"I was sittin' on a ridge lookin' down on the biggest buck in the county, possibly the whole state. It was dead in the sights of my favorite antique Remington .30-.06 bolt action huntin' rifle that I had inherited from my granddad. I squeezed the trigger and nothing happened. I worked the bolt and chambered a new round, took a deep breath and tried again. Nothing. I watched the big white flag jumping through the pines and quickly disappear. I was so angry I smashed my gun against the oak tree I was standing behind and broke the stock. Later I realized the safety had been on."

"Well I was all set up and comfortable when I had a sudden need to answer the call of nature. Quickly I crawled out of my blind and searched for a spot downwind to do my business. I stripped down to my long johns, opened the flap and backed up to a tree to hide my white backside from view. Just as I finished up I realized all I had was white toilet paper. Nobody from the camp was hunting in my area so I was feeling pretty safe using white instead of hunters orange. Just as I reached around to clean myself, I heard a gun shot. I dropped down and looked in the direction of the shot. Then there was another shot and some snow fell out of a tree near me. I pulled up my pants and started to run, toilet paper trailing behind. When I returned to camp and heard one of the other hunters telling a story about the one he missed, I thanked God they don't set the sights at the factory."

A few of the stories I have heard over the years. Happy Hunting. Until tomorrow then keep your powder, and other things, dry.

Ken

Two Burritos and the Joy of Painting

Recently I came across an old PBS show called The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross, I find it utterly amazing this man could take 8-12 dabs of paint, a 2" standard paint brush, a fantail brush and a 1" paint scraper (palette knife) and magically jab, dab, swish and scrape a beautiful landscape painting that many people would pay large amounts of money to own. And do it in just 30-45 minutes.

After the Rain by Bob Ross

So your wondering where the two burritos comes in. I ate one when having lunch with my mom and my aunt and my cousins. The first one was so good that I ate another for dinner. A few hours later while watching the Joy of Painting on Youtube, I get an irresistible urge. Suddenly i have an overwhelming desire to run to the bathroom before I paint a masterpiece of my own.

Now I know why Picasso painted The Scream...he couldn't make it of the pier in time,

The Scream by Picasso

The moral of the story is don't eat (the american idea of) Mexican food twice in the same day but if you do keep a roll of toilet paper handy and don't stray too far from a commode or you'll be making a Scream of your own.

Books I am currently reading: Dantes Divine Comedy, Stuart Woods Stone Barrington series, Robert E. Keller Knights series and LeRoy Neimen autobiography.

Gotta put this one to bed. Until tomorrow,

Ken 

Wednesday With Mom

Day 3


Why is it I wake up in the morning and jump out of bed feeling refreshed until I remember I'm spending the day with my mother, then suddenly, I have an overwhelming urge to crawl back into bed and pull the covers over my head until tomorrow?

My mother is a master purveyor of negativity. It rolls off her tongue like lies from a politician. No one believes me when I tell them. Anyone who meets her thinks she's just a sweet old lady. She just smiles and nods her white mantled head while deciding whether she'll devour their hopes and dreams right then or wait until later. She's patient, my mother is, she'll wait until she has you completely fooled and then, oh so slowly, she'll start to whisper in your ear until your hopes and dreams have vanished. The Grinch loved Christmas before he meet my mother.

Today we went on a road trip to see my aunt and a couple of cousins. A mini family reunion if you will. My mom and my aunt are the only two of five siblings surviving. Curiously of the five my mom is the oldest and my aunt is the youngest. I suspect there may be a plot to "out live" all of us. My mother has already suggested she might out live my brothers and me (I only drink unopened bottled water when I visit her).

I pulled up in front of the door to her assisted living complex and she worked her way into the car. Right away she started in on the cook in the dining room. Breakfast was 4 sausage patties and a dry biscuit with no butter or jelly. She had her usual Cheerios. Dinner last night was suppose to be turkey but it couldn't be because the gravy was brown and everybody knows turkey gravy is white. I could have told her that I have seen brown turkey gravy that comes in a can but I was too smart to take the bait and just nodded my agreement.

The manager was having a Veterans Day celebration according to mom "just score points". Wednesday is evening bingo but as my mom noted "the prize box is full of junk". Once again I pointed out to her that the bingo is a courtesy for the residents and prizes are a bonus. This was answered with a withering scowl. After another round of which residents are "sick in the head" I just grunted. She doesn't really pay attention to me when she's complaining, so I can grunt, hiccup or fart, it doesn't matter so long as I make some noise of agreement.

We arrived at my cousins house after an hour of gloom. As we pulled into the driveway the sweet old woman persona surfaced instantaneously. We had a nice visit and before we left my aunt pulled me aside to ask how things were at the residence. She knows what my mom is really like. As I unloaded on my aunt  all of the injustices, I had to stop and take a deep breath, I had promised myself I wouldn't cry as that would not be befitting of a 56 year old man. My aunt just shook her head in sympathy and gave me a hug and a "go with God".

It was a relatively quiet ride home as my mother contemplated the parting remark of a cousin.

"We should get together again soon because you just never know."

Seems she has been attending a lot of funerals lately. Finally my mom looked over at me with an eager gleam in her eye.

"How are you feeling, kiddo?"

It was a very fast ride home.

Until tomorrow remember, don't believe everything you read on the internet.

Ken

Tomorrow a list of books I am currently reading. Goodnight.

Mid Michigan Writers Group Is Awesome

Hello,
This is the first post to my new blog. I plan to post everyday about my life here in Houghton Lake, Michigan. I'll write about some of the events and other things happening around town. Most of it real with a little "blarney" mixed in. From the general store with the two old guys playing checkers, to the barber shop philosophy and, of course, the fish stories. The coffee is always hot, the cider cold and the stories are plentiful. So if you enjoy what you read share it with your friends.

Today is the second Monday of the month which means the Mid Michigan Writers are meeting in West Branch. Tonight is special as it is the first meeting that I will be the moderator, I was voted in at the last meeting by near unanimous yea vote, with one nay vote (mine). I'm sure this will be an honor and a lot of fun. I enjoy the group and look forward to the meetings twice each month ( the second and fourth Monday).

Mid Michigan Writers are a great bunch who are serious about writing and offer constructive criticism of each others work. Two members read something they recently wrote for critique by the group. No more than ten pages double spaced if you run over you'll have to save it for the next opening. We schedule will who read for us once a quarter at the business meeting. Even though we schedule ahead all members are encouraged to bring something to read in case we have an opening or the scheduled readings are short as is often the case with poems.

So if you are a writer or an aspiring writer who doesn't know where to start. and interested in interacting with like minded people. Come to one of our meetings held in the downstairs meeting room of the West Branch Public Library on the second and fourth Monday each month at 6:30 pm. For more information about the group, the groups activities and the benefits of membership click here Mid Michigan Writers. Let us you know you saw this article (it will make me feel good) and I hope to see you at one of our meetings.

Note: No meeting on December 14th do to our Christmas Dinner. I'll be sure to post about that after.

Thanks for stopping by. Hope you'll come back soon and often.